2 Realizations That Made Me Want To Give Up Alcohol

And how it happened effortlessly without willpower.

When I was young, my dad used to say to me, “Don’t smoke, and don’t take drugs, but you can drink like a fish.” My parents were very conservative and strict, so why would my dad be giving me his blessing when it comes to alcohol?

My parents only ever drank in social situations and at parties. When they did, from my perspective, all had a lot of fun. Mom was usually a little stressed juggling all her parenting, household, and work duties. Still, she would turn into a giggly teenager after a drink. And dad, who was always quite shy, would turn into the life of the party.

I was a straight-A student who always wanted to do everything right. I learned early on that alcohol was a socially acceptable recreational drug. We refer to “Drugs & Alcohol.” We separate alcohol as distinct from other mind-altering and addictive substances. It IS different! For one, it’s legal, and you don’t need a prescription for it.

So for most of my life, I drank quite a lot. I started in college, and it became an acceptable part of adult life. I cringe now when I remember being proud that I could drink with the boys and keep up. My motto used to be: “I can drink any man under the table.” Oh my, how embarrassing that sounds now!

There was a time when I would have found it very difficult to stop drinking. I quit smoking 20 years ago, and as hard as that was, I remember thinking that it was “easier” than not drinking alcohol.

But, over the last five years, I have stopped drinking. There wasn’t one day when I gave it up, and I don’t count the days that I’ve been sober. I DON’T WANT to drink anymore, and the change didn’t require willpower, strict abstinence, or any feelings of deprivation. It’s been an effortless and permanent behavior change.

So what changed? It was my understanding of alcohol. I saw alcohol for what it is instead of an acceptable high that even my parents condoned.

Alcohol is a poison!

Alcohol is ethanol or ethyl alcohol, which is toxic and tastes terrible. The only way we can drink it is to add sugar and flavors to conceal its disgusting taste. Why would anyone drink poison? If you think back to your first sip of alcohol, chances are that you found it disgusting. But you persevered and drank it anyway until you got accustomed to the taste.

I am not a health freak by any means, but I do my best to lead a healthy life. I watch my weight, I exercise, and I try not to eat processed foods. Yet, I thought nothing of downing wine every night. How stupid is that? Why would I ingest a bottle of poison every evening?

You’re aware that alcohol can affect your liver, but did you know that alcohol affects every system in your body? Alcohol affects your digestive system, central nervous system, circulatory system, and endocrine system (Science Inside Alcohol Project).

What about the reports that say “a moderate amount of alcohol may have a beneficial effect on the coronary system”? I’m not trying to dispute that claim at all. A “moderate” amount of alcohol (i.e., 4–5 oz. of wine per day) is minimal indeed, by my standards. “May” have a beneficial effect means that there are many other considerations that need to be taken into account for this to be true. And the positive impact is only on one of the body’s systems. Meanwhile, alcohol continues to affect every other system.

Many people grab on to this one piece of information that condones alcohol use. They convince themselves that drinking alcohol is healthy. It is not.

I no longer want to numb my senses or escape

Most people love the feeling of euphoria that alcohol gives them. It’s an escape from reality. It’s a DRUG! Over time, I realized that I no longer wanted to numb my senses. I no longer wanted to escape. I wanted to face life full-on and sober. Numbing or dulling your experience of life doesn’t help you. The problems don’t go away. The situations don’t resolve themselves. They are still there when you sober up or when the alcohol-induced euphoria disappears.

I would never consider taking any illegal drugs to induce a “high” or escape reality. So why was it okay to drink alcohol? It goes back to the fact that it’s socially acceptable, and even my parents approved this drug.

Some of you may say that you don’t drink to escape or dull your senses. You drink because you like the taste. Well, I like the taste of pizza, but I don’t eat pizza 5x a week. Suppose you’re anything but a very occasional drinker. In that case, chances are that you’re drinking to numb your senses, escape or fit in.

What sort of society would require you to drink to “fit in”?

Over time, I realized I don’t want to ingest poison, and I don’t want to dull my senses. I don’t know how many years of life I have left on this glorious planet, but I still have too much to do and experience. I want to be fully present for every minute.

But many of us drink to “fit in socially.” Since giving up alcohol, I’ve experienced firsthand what it’s like to be a social pariah. People try to encourage me to have a drink, “Ah, won’t you have just one? One drink won’t hurt you.” Or they assume I was an alcoholic or had a drinking problem which is also not the case. I drank “normally” — well, what is considered “normal” in our alcohol-laden society.

You will be dull and boring in a social setting if you don’t drink. Many drinkers cite this as a reason for not abstaining. Many of my friends have assumed that I’ll be no fun to be with if I don’t join in the drinking in social situations.

Could it be that drinkers feel threatened when they have a sober person in their midst? Perhaps it makes them feel inadequate that they don’t have the resolve to do the same. Sometimes, it’s easier to say that you can’t drink because you’re taking antibiotics or acting as the designated driver. Those seem to be socially acceptable “reasons” for sobriety.

You’re NOT smarter, cuter, funnier, or sexier when you’ve had a drink. When you’re sober, it’s easy to see how stupid people act when they’ve been drinking. Of course, the drinkers themselves don’t see it. There are endless stories of work Christmas parties that end in tears and embarrassment because of unacceptable behavior. When you’re drunk and let your hair down in front of your work colleagues, it can lead to disaster. Yet most drinkers still feel that people are more fun to be with when they drink.

Change is a-comin'.

There is a slow shift in society’s attitude toward alcohol. Many A-list celebrities don’t drink, such as Jennifer Lopez, Daniel Radcliffe, Naomi Campbell, Jennifer Hudson, Andy Murray, John Travolta, and Eminem. There are the “Sober Curious” and the “Naked Mind” sobriety movements, amongst others. There is also an emergence of alcohol-free bars and alcohol-free drinks. I hope that I might see a change in how our society views alcohol in my lifetime.

Takeaways

• Educate yourself about the effects of alcohol on the brain and body.
• When we change our understanding or thinking about something and have an “aha” moment, we effortlessly change our behavior.
• Willpower doesn’t work because, in most cases, it goes against our current beliefs.

Change your thoughts, and it follows that your behavior will change like magic!

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