Black Confidence
10 Things You Should Never Say to a Black Woman
The world has made it almost impossible for Black women to not be confident.
From the moment school starts, and we get shoved into that first desk, we’re given reasons to doubt ourselves.
We’re told our hair is too nappy, our lips are too full, and our skin is too dark.
We’re told to sit down, shut up, and stay in the background and out of sight.
But still, somehow, after all this, we find a way to be confident.
The black woman has been through a lot.
She’s been labelled everything from ignorant to unbalanced, and we’ve been exposed to every shade of sexism imaginable.
These experiences have shaped us as both individuals and a community, but we are far from being defined by them.
You can call us names, try to put us in our place or even suggest that we’ve risen above our heads.
But one thing that is not up for debate is the need for Black women to be celebrated.
There are many things that you should never say to a Black woman. Here are just 10 of them:
- “You’re too loud.”
- “You’re angry all the time.”
- “You’re not like other girls.”
- “You’re not feminine enough.”
- “You need to straighten your hair.”
- “You need to lighten your skin.”
- “What are you really?”
- “Where are you really from?”
- “Can I touch your hair?”
- “ You’re exotic.”
It’s time to start celebrating Black women instead of putting them down. We are strong, confident, and beautiful just the way we are.
It can be hard to be a Black woman in a world that constantly tries to tell us that we’re somehow defective.
That we don’t measure up.
But that’s not the real world.
The real world is full of people who celebrate diversity, and that’s a world that we need to strive to create.
We are not defined by our hair texture, skin shade, hair length, accent, or style.
We are not defined by the neighborhoods we come from, and we are not defined by our age, marital status, or the number of kids we have.
We are not defined by the men in our lives or our clothes.
We are defined by our intelligence, passions, and the love that others have for us.
We are women, and we are here to stay. We aren’t going anywhere; we are bold, proud, and unapologetic.
So the next time that you feel like saying one of those things to a Black woman stop and think about what you’re really saying.
Because what you’re really saying is that you don’t value us, you don’t value our beauty, and you don’t value our intelligence.
Whether you realize it or not, you have just been told to “shut up and sit down.”
If you are a Black woman afraid of speaking up, you are not being heard.
If you are a Black woman afraid of being different, you are not being respected.
If you are a Black woman afraid of speaking up, you are not being validated.